Worried About What’s Round The Corner?
The picture is of a lovely tree tunnel, and when I was thinking about writing an article about ‘what might be round the corner,’ it just seemed to fit!
When I talk with clients, there are many fears that stop them moving forwards, and the fear of change is right up there on the list!
Change is inevitable if we set out on the path of self improvement, personal development and goal achievement. That may seem obvious but it’s worth stating. Because in order for our results to change, our actions have to change, and in order for actions to change, attitude has to change.
That’s a lot of change, and it scares the living daylights out of a lot of people!
It’s so scary, because the changes will move life away from the present circumstances which we are used to, towards a life which we cannot predict. Yes, we can make educated guesses, and we may be fairly hopeful about some of the changes, but it could be argued that we can’t be *sure*.
And of course, some personal development or goal achievement moves will involve changes that might be real leaps in the dark, that we genuinely don’t know what will happen.
It might be a change in our circle of friends, or how family views us. It might mean a job change, or change in living arrangements. It might mean moving to a completely new area, or another country!
More likely it will involve a change in lifestyle habits, or a change from the safety net of a regular pay check to the heady and uncertain world of self-employment.
It could be it’s the change in ‘ourselves’ that the progress would bring that scares us the most.
So, having covered all the possible changes, and accepting that the unknown can be scary, it’s no surprise that it stops people moving forwards at all, right?
Well, no, it’s no surprise, but often it’s also used as an *excuse*, and it doesn’t have to be that way.
I have several ways of helping clients deal with the fear of change, and here’s something else that isn’t a surprise, I’ve going to cover 2 of them here today..!
Firstly, since fear of possible change is just that, fear of ‘possible‘ change, it might be helped by simply looking at it in a different way – that it might not be as bad as you think!
If we think back to how many times in our life we have said:
‘Oh, that wasn’t nearly as bad I thought it would be,’
it will be a LOT of times!
You’ve maybe seen the FEAR acronym before?
- F = False
- E = Expectations
- A = Appearing
- R = Real
Fears over the future simply turn out to be not as bad as we thought, more often than not. I’m not saying there will never be changes that we don’t like, but we just don’t need to let the fear of it hold us back.
It’s misplaced energy, and it’s wasted energy.
The second way I like to view the fear of change is to view it as an opportunity of change instead!
Remember, the particular fears I’m talking about come about when we look at personal development, improving our situation and setting goals. The whole point of us going through that process is to bring our lives more back in line with our passions, our joys, our soul.
If that’s the case, then the changes around the corner should be looked forward to rather than feared, because it means we are on the road to the more fulfilling life for ourselves – and so yes, it will be a change, but it will be a GOOD change!
And that way, we can take the attitude of ‘oh, I wonder what it will look like?’ with excitement rather than trepidation, because if we are directing the change, and we find we don’t like it, we can change it again!
That’s the key – if we let fear of change keep us stuck where we are, then we will still get buffeted by the circumstances that life has a habit of throwing at everyone. That’s just the way it is, and sometimes it’s not always pleasant. So instead of that, WHY NOT choose to be in control, to set changes in progress that WE WANT, that we have decided on and acted towards.
It’s a much better way to look at it, in my view.
So, look to your own path in life, whether tree-lined or not, then decide that whatever happens the journey along the way can be soaked up and enjoyed. Then if you’re worried because you’re not sure what’s around the corner – it might not be anywhere near as bad as you think. I’ve said it before, and I’ll finish by saying it again, get round there and find out!
I am an award-winning coach who loves to help clients overcome key challenges such as change management. Let me help you banish your fears so you can rock the rest of 2016!
I hope you found some value in this post. If so please share the love.
Your Black Belt Success Coach
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